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[03 May 2007|03:38am] |
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 depressed |
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damien rice |
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I'm officially done with my first year of college! My last final was monday...I was more drained then excited and ready to celebrate. Especially today when I found out some of my grades. Damn statistics.
On a lighter note...Grindhouse is AWESOME, so i recommend everyone to go see it. Robert rodriguez and quentin tarantino are amazing.
I just watched The last kiss. Its depressing and basically about relationships falling apart. It made me feel like I will always be miserable or alone, either or. If im with someone its bc I can't tell them how I really feel bc im scared of hurting them or I never really know what I want or how i feel. I can't be with the one I want to be with because they don't know how I feel (if I really feel that way) or they dont want to be with me. Someone mention to me that maybe I'm scared of commitment bc I've never had a relationship. Yes, ive dated and i am currently dating someone but I don't want them to my boyfriend. I don't have strong enough feelings for them bc when I compare how I feel about them to someone else in the past, my liking just does not measure up. But is that bc I've always had stronger feelings for someone who has never had feelings for me so am I just holding back? what if I'm not holding back? How do I tell him? I guess I just have to talk about it. I suck at telling someone what I'm thinking bc i dont what to say the wrong thing and end up hurting someone. I'm a big sissy. That's all.
I need to go home. I need to see some people. I don't want to leave my apartment, though, but I don't like being by myself all the time. I like it most of the time, but then i just think too much.
I think I'm going to be addicted to wii.
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| Home sweet home |
[15 Nov 2006|02:07am] |
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mood |
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music |
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Bradley Hathaway |
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i went to gainesville this weekend to visit my best friend, jessica newman! i had so much fun until i fell down the stairs twice hurt my knee and ankle and thought everyone left me so i started balling. i lost my nose ring so i had to but my HUGE diamond earring in my nose...it was hilarious...i looked retarded. Then i headed back to jax with Black John for the first time in like 3 months. It was good to be home...i missed my family and my dogs and cat so much! my momma took me shopping!! :) i hung out with lexi, whom i miss so much...then went to the paxon vs gulf breeze game to see all of my old team mates. we all went to lunch. alex walker met us up at panera. He cracks me up, i love him. went to rachaels and bonded...i cant wait till she comes to visit. Jerry took me back to orlando. i love that kid.
so i finally get to play soccer! i went to practice tonight and we had practice one of the girls backyard. she has a full size soccer field in her backyard! plus a pool and bball court. im really excited bc i think we have a good team :) all i got to do though is get back in shape and get a brace from my doc. yayyyy!
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| ughhh |
[08 Nov 2006|11:16pm] |
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mood |
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 frustrated |
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music |
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itunes shuffle |
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im sick and tired of waiting
FOR people to call back and other things
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pamass's journal
